we need each other

God tends to teach me themes through periods of my life. Here's a few: surrender, worship, only hope, boundaries, and reconciliation. Right now I feel like God is teaching me about community. I have always had community, an amazing one, but now I have really been able to put my finger on it. I tend to try to do everything on my own, not valuing the community that God has put within my reach. I have learned to rely on others and to reach out and confess my need. God is stirring me into community, especially through our trip to Africa and our NFG. I have been blessed beyond my small vision of a community. God has given me so many great friends, family, and our church. It is humbling to know my need of my friends and one of the most courageous/difficult thing to let your friend carry you. I sometimes feel guilt when others take on so much of my junk, but easily love to take on theirs. This is not a community, it's just me helping others. Actually it's not helping when I don't let them help me. But when you  introduce the collaborative work of each other it is electric. It amazes me of what God can do with his people when they put their trust in him, take his love, and transplant it into others around them. This can only be supernatural. All this to say... I love community now and have a deeper appreciation but still struggle to truly share my feelings, needs, and burdens. It is just a struggle for me. Does any of this even make sense? I'm rambling. 

PS. this is waaaaaay off topic, but I watched No Country for Old Men in my quest of watching all the winners of Best Picture Oscars last night. Does anyone have insight into the final scene or in the movie itself? I would love to discuss.

Dave and Buster's

So I learned a piece of information that could have been helpful after all these years of playing Ski ball... did anyone realize that there is a lightning rod at the bottom of the game and if you hit a ball in at the same point it lights up, you get double points?! Beth so greatly pointed this out and I never knew. 20 some odd years of playing ski ball and I never knew. Not that I would even be able to do anything about it. My NFG (neighborhood fellowship group) went to Dave and Busters this week for our fun night out. I can't believe I don't go here more often (well, I do because you can spend lots of useless time and money). We played a racing game, dance dance revolution, basketball, and a trivia game. Here are my prizes that I chose. Although I felt a little rushed, I was happy with my choices. Jack picked the hacky sack. I picked the yo-yo, gummi hamburger, and mint chocolate chip ring pop. Ring pops remind me of going to the baseball field in the summer and getting snow cones and ring pops. Here is me enjoying my gummi cheese burger. It was so good. 

Prayer

Some of you know my friend, Mary Jane, from my college days, but to those who don't... she was my roommate at Auburn my sophomore year and in nursing school with me. She  and her husband were pregnant with twins and her water broke this week at 26 weeks. I was actually planning on going up on Saturday to her shower. One of the girls' (they are both girls) placenta ruptured and they did an emergency c-section. Right now all I know is that they are in NICU and stable. Please pray for their health and for mary jane and jason. Give them rest, peace, and trust in the Lord during this time. You can check out her blog under my links! 

Opening Ceremonies 2008

I just love the Olympics. I think it's all of the heart-warming stories and victories. The patriotic pride. Yes, this is all so mushy, but it's true. I've been caught up in Michael Phelps 8 medals, but come on, can you show the other guys on the podium during the ceremony?! I love the gymnastics... seeing Nastia win the gold all-around with her dad standing by and shawn winning the balance beam and her parents bawling. I just wish Alicia could have won in the vault and somehow the Chinese gymnast's would expose their real age. ah, you gotta love it.

Something else I love? Dress up parties. Our latest was the Opening Ceremonies, favorite Olympic event (although some dressed as objects related). I was equestrian and Jack, waterboy on the basketball team. Some others: a gold medal (good job, Marisa! you were jipped), swimmers, cyclist, kayakers, soccer players and a confused fan. But the winners were: 

Gold-the torch

Silver-Shooting Bronze-

Smog (mad props for creativity!). 

It was such a fun time and even ended on a high note with some Rock band. I'm ready for the next party!

Stretched

Did I mention how much the Lord stretched me in Africa? Oh yeah. When we arrived at Action International for our mini orientation, someone mentioned that we would be stretched like a rubber band. "yeah yeah" I thought. But oh yes, yes I was. Those who know me well, know that I hate public speaking and that I turn red. In fact, I am an advocate for red faced people... those who turn red and people who don't turn red say "you're turning red". So my goal is to tell people not to say that, we know we are red. Why must you point it out?! ... anyways, back to the story. (don't get me started, don't even get me started) Well, we visited several women's ministries in Gulu throughout the week. Two groups of women who had been affected by HIV, two groups (butterfly groups) who were child mothers, and the "moms" at the orphanage.  (When we say child mothers, we are speaking of the women who kidnapped by the Lord's resistance army and forced to be wives of soldiers at ages 14, 15 and now have returned after escaping) At each place our friends would say, "and now you will share". Yes, Cindi shared about every time. Testimonies, a word of encouragement, or a verse. It just showed me the power of the holy spirit. God was there and revealed every time what to say, share, or pray. It was quite amazing not only to see me get up and share, but want to every time! God was so faithful and I was so glad I got that experience. I was stretched. It wasn't about me and my red face or my lack of words, it was about having a new relationship with these women, my new friends, how I can help them and to share what God has taught me in the quiet of being with him. Listening to the Holy Spirit calling me into fellowship with him and my fellow sisters, forgetting my agenda and wants, focusing on him. There is nothing better than that. Granted I will continually need to call on his power because I still turn red and always will!

albertine

A sweet song about Rwanda, but if I put in "Uganda" it also works. I love the chorus of this song and moves me to tears thinking "now that I have seen, I am responsible. Faith without deeds is dead. Now that I have held you, I cannot let go till you are." Brooke Fraser wrote it from her experience in Rwanda, where thousands have been killed by genocide. 

I relate to this song because I think of my sweet friends in Uganda and Sudan. One man I met, Tito, who is the Regional Director over Sudan for African Leadership, shared with us his story. The sweetest man you will ever meet and hilarious. He told us of how he was born surrounded in war, living around war, and probably will die in war. How God redeemed his life and has blessed him with a wife and two children. His story struck me and now that I have seen and heard, his story and all the others must be heard. 

Check out Brooke's song-

www.youtube.com/watch?v=WGx-xU6TnU8

back in america

Unfortunately, I caught a cold the day I left Africa. I think it was that precious baby I was holding for an hour. It was worth it, but I have been feeling pretty icky for 5 days now. The time change has not been too bad, Jack and I did sleep all the way through the night when we returned on Friday. There is so much to say about our trip. I fell in love with Africa, as I knew I would. It took the whole first week for God to convince me that I was really there. During worship, I would here the yells of the Acholi women and start crying realizing my dream was a reality. I kept reminding myself I was here and then I would get emotional again. Once I came to reality, I fully grasped what I was there to see, hear, and do. God completely met me in Africa. He was there in the faces I met. He was in the prayers and songs I heard. Faces I had never seen before directly connected to my heart the moment I saw them and they spoke. God connected hearts through himself. I knew my sisters in Christ deeper than any worldly life long relationship in that 2 seconds of introduction. All because of my God. His love runs deeper and wider than I could ever imagine. The most important thing I learned was about relationships. Relation was the focus of every second. The women there immediately embraced one another. No comparing of outfits. No need to prove your self, to sound smart, cool, funny, or experienced. The women embraced each other with Christ's love no matter their status. It was a TRUE testament of the bond of being a family member in Christ. 

When people ask me how the trip went, how I wish I could transplant them into the experience, but there is a reason they weren't there, God sent me to tell them about it. So I ponder about what it is God revealed to me. I keep thinking back to the days in Uganda. Each time we saw a group, we shared and worshiped with them and in response they were so thankful. So thankful, that many said it was a "miracle day", one women "had no more words", or that they were "blessed by God". Many also wanted us to share what we had seen with our people back home. The people were in poverty, a war torn country, but also making a difference. Taking what God has handed them and turning it into hope. Women who spend every moment of their day caring for orphans. Child mothers, who were kidnapped by soldiers, forced to become a wife among many, and abandoned. Men, women, and children affected by AIDS or living in an over crowded IDP camp. What was the most amazing about all of this, was the joy. My friends had more joy than I had ever witnessed and gone through more sufferings than I've ever witnessed. They praised God at every small thing he gave them. I have taken all these things back with me. Remembering the Lord has given me all things and to praise him every moment of my day. Encouraging, loving, and serving my sisters and brothers in Christ, as well as those not, gasp-my enemies. But most importantly, I only can do this through my Lord Jesus Christ's power.  These verses came alive through my friends... "For the love of Christ controls us, because we have concluded this: that one has died for all, therefore all have died; and he died for all, that those who live might no longer live for themselves but for him who for their sake died and was raised. From now on, therefore, we regard no one according to the flesh. Even though we once regarded Christ according  to the flesh, we regard him thus no longer. Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold the new has come. " 2 Corinthians 5:14-17

When we were at one of the Butterfly Groups in Gulu, which are the child mothers, a woman shared a passage to us. This gives testament to their lives- "O Lord, by these things men live, and in all these is the life of my spirit. Oh restore me to health and make me live! Behold, it was for my welfare that I had great bitterness; but in love you have delivered my life from the pit of destruction, for you have cast all my sins behind your back. For Sheol does not thank you; death does not praise you; those who go down to the pit do not hope for your faithfulness. The living, the living, he thanks you, as I do this day; the father makes known to the children your faithfulness. The Lord will save me, and we will play my music on stringed instruments all the days of our lives, at the house of the Lord." Isaiah 38:16-20 They were saved by the Lord and praise him with song all of their days. This is my prayer. O Lord, may your spirit dwell in me and grow in knowledge of you. Set my feet to praise you all the days of my life and live only for you. Let me forsake all other things of this world for you. You being my all in all. I praise you for sending me to meet my African sisters and brothers. Glory to you.